By Caeriel Crestin | For Weekender

Sign language: What do the stars have in line for you?

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Golden State's Stephen Curry hit a game-winning 3-pointer against Oklahoma City. Warriors photo

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Being a Pisces—the mysterious chameleon of the zodiac—can be bewildering, I know. You’re so multitalented, but those abilities aren’t necessarily very consistent. Sometimes something’s incredibly easy for you—as simple as drawing breath—and then the same exact thing can be horribly difficult the next time you try it. It’s very hard to predict what’ll work when. That’s where I come in. This week’s advice? Be a social butterfly. Flirtation’s your current most-active superpower. Don’t waste time with solemn solo contemplation; other people, that’s where it’s at. See where your natural charm will take you; I’m wagering it’s pretty far.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Accept every invitation you get this week, and crash at least one party. It would be a shame to waste the pheromones you’re putting out. You’re radiating some kind of subtle subconscious signal for people to love you, to make deals with you, or to screw you (and not screw you over). Why ever would you waste this kind of influence by staying home alone? Make your beauty (whatever form it takes) work for you, because it can this week. It’s a goddamn indefatigable Clydesdale. The only limit to how far you can take it is how far you’re willing to go.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

Say it. Say it: “I love you.” Yeah, sure, you’ve said it before, but you haven’t said it often enough lately. Expressing your feelings is important this week. Don’t be stingy about it, regardless of the issues and complexities currently surrounding your relationship. I don’t care if it’s always you who has to open the doors when they get shut (whether by accident or on purpose). That may simply be your role here. These things are never perfectly balanced, or they balance in ways that aren’t quite so linear and obvious. So just say it, already. Things will feel a thousand times better once you do.

Gemini (May 21-June 20)

Things ought to be pretty good this week. Not fantastic, or mind-blowing, but “excellent” might be an appropriate description. Remember to notice! This winter’s had you focusing an awful lot on the negative aspects of what’s going on, despite your innate natural optimism, so much so that you’ve developed a bad habit of not noticing when things are going more or less okay: you’re healthy, content, something didn’t go wrong that could have, etc. Just pay attention. In the grand scheme, you may not even remember this week in a few years, because nothing incredibly significant is likely to happen, but that doesn’t mean you can’t truly enjoy it now. Please try.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)

No one’s actually dragging their feet. It may feel that way, but resist jumping to that conclusion while you endure this week’s frequent and irksome delays. Those you’re communicating with may seem reluctant to help you or give you answers, but that’s only because you don’t know what’s really going on at their end. Things are just taking longer than usual. It’s not ill will you’re dealing with, it’s more something akin to metaphysical molasses. Be patient throughout the week, before you say or do something you’ll be embarrassed by later. Give folks the benefit of the doubt. They will slog through the astrological resistance and get back to you… eventually.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

The door you opened (or project you began) about two weeks ago is about to come to the attention of the people you tried (consciously or unconsciously) to hide it from. Things could go either way, now: they might choose to stomp your efforts into mush, or they could help you finish what you started. Three factors influence their decision, two of which you have no control over: the nature of the path or project, and their individual characters. Therefore, concentrate on the third: how you present what you’re up to. This could make all the difference; these folks are either buying it, or destroying it. So don’t let your actions simply speak for themselves. Open your mouth and sell them, hard.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You’re a bee who has fallen asleep in a flower. You worked your butt off to find the biggest, juiciest, most beautiful bloom in the garden, then you took a roll in the pollen and passed out, somehow forgetting that there’s this whole second half to your job. Wake up! There are two good reasons for properly completing the task you set out to do: 1. You’ve already done the hard part; you know what comes next, and even though it’s a lot of busy work, none of it is especially difficult (and there’s honey at the end of the day). 2. The lawnmower’s coming.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Being torn is an awfully familiar state for you poor Librans, isn’t it? I can’t remember the last time you weren’t of two minds about something. But nevertheless, this week’s internal dilemma will probably feel fairly unfamiliar and new: negotiating the conflict between your needs and the needs of your friends, lover(s), and family. You might even resent them for even having desires, now that it seems like helping them out means neglecting your own. That’s totally understandable, but resist it anyway. Try to remember that what’s good for those you love is good for you—really and directly, not just in some New Age karmic kind of way. Yep, I’m helping you decide. Give your sweethearts a hand, at your own expense if necessary. Trust me: they need you more than you need you, at the moment.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

How powerful are you? Sometimes you hide from yourself the degree of influence, control, and sheer bloody might that you wield. Maybe it frightens or discomfits you. It certainly scares the shit out of some of the people who know you. However, you of all people should know that refusing to “know thyself” is a bad choice, especially for those as potentially dangerous as you can be. This week, become aware of the different kinds, and degrees, of power that you possess and use, because you may soon have to choose which tools (or “weapons”) you’ll put down, and which new ones you’ll pick up; a decision that should be easy—provided you know exactly which ones you already have.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

The things we do for love. Okay, this week someone you love is asking you to do some pretty weird shit, or at least stuff that’s totally out of character for you—like behaving. But of course, though, pleasing other people is in character for you, even if it means doing things you’d never consider on your own. Please don’t resent the one you adore for making such strange or annoying requests—everybody knows just how much they do for you, without you even asking. Just indulge those odd moods and whims; it won’t kill you, and (once again) proving your love and devotion is by no means a bad thing.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Like a massive five-mile train slowly lurching into forward motion, so are your plans. Even though you started stoking the engines ages ago, you’d begun to despair about the lack of movement, and wonder if you’d just burnt gallons of fuel in vain. Actually, you simply had tons of inertia to overcome. This week you should see the slow beginnings of some real progress. Be patient. It takes a while for big trains and big plans to pick up momentum. Luckily, there are almost no station-stops between here and your destination. Once you get up to speed, you’ll close the distance faster than sound.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

What happened over the winter that you still haven’t dealt with? Your relationship(s) have been more or less screwed because of it, but you still haven’t addressed the issue because it’s never felt like the “right time.” To hell with that. While you’ve waited, the real feelings surrounding the shit that went down have begun to fade and warp, replaced by twisted, tangled stuff that comes from your head, not your heart. This shit is a lot harder to straighten out and resolve. Stop the trend. Get to work on the messy knots that have already formed, this week, regardless of what else is going on.

Celebrity Birthdays

Stephen Curry: March 14, 1988

Will.i.am: March 15, 1975

Alexandra Daddario: March 16, 1986

Rob Kardashian: March 17, 1987

Adam Levine: March 18, 1979

Bruce Willis: March 19, 1955

Ruby Rose: March 20, 1986

To contact Caeriel send mail to [email protected]

By Caeriel Crestin | For Weekender

Golden State’s Stephen Curry hit a game-winning 3-pointer against Oklahoma City.
Warriors photo
http://theweekender.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/web1_curry.jpgGolden State’s Stephen Curry hit a game-winning 3-pointer against Oklahoma City.
Warriors photo
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To contact Caeriel send mail to [email protected]

Celebrity Birthdays

Stephen Curry: March 14, 1988

Will.i.am: March 15, 1975

Alexandra Daddario: March 16, 1986

Rob Kardashian: March 17, 1987

Adam Levine: March 18, 1979

Bruce Willis: March 19, 1955

Ruby Rose: March 20, 1986