Advice from Melissa: I’m not interested in being a bridesmaid. How do I let the bride down easy?
A girl who I casually know just asked me to be in her bridal party. While I was flattered, I was taken back a bit because I do not consider her a friend of that caliber and I fear she holds our friendship in a higher regard than it actually is. I always saw her as a casual acquaintance, not a lifelong friend who I would want in my wedding party. How do I tell her no without hurting her feelings? I feel like a horrible person!
Dear Marital Mate,
This does not make you a bad person. It is possible that while you have an abundant and robust circle of friends, she does not. If you are truly uncomfortable being in such an important role, my best advice is to let her down easy. I wouldn’t be blunt and say “we aren’t friends,” but I would approach it saying that being a bridesmaid is a huge honor and while you are flattered she would think to ask you, you don’t feel comfortable. Or if you do not want to hurt her feelings, you could always say that being a bridesmaid is a huge expense and it just isn’t in your budget right now. I would approach this situation with kid gloves. You don’t want to hurt or offend her, truly she thinks very highly of you and you want to be respectful of that. It is OK to say no.
Girl Talk began in 2012 as a telltale horror story of the city’s most epic dating disasters and has evolved into a column about love, life experiences and growing up. Melissa also has a weekly Girl Talk TV segment on PA Live, WBRE, and a radio segment every Wednesday on 98.5 KRZ.