SORRY MOM & DAD: The devil went down to Suscon

Print This Page

First Posted: 8/12/2013

There’s a legend about a road along local woods that is haunted as S#!T.

According to legend, as explained to me, in the 1970s a newlywed couple were driving to their honeymoon during a snowstorm, when they engaged in a heated argument. The bride, still in her virgin-white dress, left the vehicle as her disgruntled groom drove off. The groom crashed his car and was killed, leaving the bride outside in the hazardous winter storm, where she froze to DEATH! On nights that capture a full moon, this woman can be seen on the side of the road, asking those daring enough to stop if she can have a ride to the top of the mountain to look for her groom. Sometimes, her screams can be heard for miles, as she begs for help to find him. She is known as the Suscon Screamer.

“Let’s go to Suscon Road!” suggested my buddy Nate one late Friday night when a group of us were hanging out. “I’ve heard crazy stories about the Suscon Screamer. Let’s go find her!”

When the group of us went, nothing happened. We heard a few sounds that made us jump, but we were certain they were sounds of animals in the woods.

“We should have walked deep in the woods!” insisted Nate as we were driving home. Even though we figured the noises were caused by wind or squirrels, everyone else was hesitant to double check.

Two nights later I called Nate with exciting news.

“I have two people who will walk in the woods with us on Suscon Road!” I told him.

While driving to Suscon Road with Nate and my friend LaToya, a friend she brought along named Nipple-Ring told us that he could communicate with spirits because he sold his soul to the devil a few years ago.

Naturally, I assumed this guy Nipple-Ring was JOKING, trying to scare us before we searched for the Suscon Screamer.

A few moments after he told us that he travelled to the pits of hell with Satan, and explained the smell as burning rubber mixed with sulfur, the stench of burning rubber and sulfur presented itself, before disappearing.

As soon as we stopped on the side of the road near a path’s entrance to the woods, Nipple-Ring got out of the car and started screaming in tongues, asking for spirits to present themselves.

Shortly after, at 3:07a.m., the time the devil supposedly surfaces the earth, a stench of rotting meat and dead animal came out of nowhere, signifying a demon’s presence, disappearing less than a minute later.

“Are you f—king kidding me? This dude really sold his soul to the devil,” I screamed to Nate and LaToya.

Nipple-Ring then grabbed Nate, made him cross a line he made with his foot in the dirt, and recited a chant in his ears.

After Nate shouted that he saw a spirit coming toward him and Nipple-Ring, I forced everyone in the car.

Sorry, Mom and Dad, for going to a haunted road with someone who sold their soul to the devil!

As we were driving off, the stench of rotting meat entered the car, disappearing when we left Suscon Road…