How to get the body of (insert hot celebrity here)

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First Posted: 12/15/2014

This time of year, with all of the holiday parties and the new year approaching, has got to be the worst time of year to be a trainer working in the fitness industry when you’re at a party full of people you don’t know. If you’re a trainer, you know what I mean.

The minute someone finds out what you do they feel compelled to tell you the reason why they gained 10 pounds, or what their resolutions are, or that they used to be in great shape, or even ask how to lose their “love handles” all while they are eating a plate full of greasy, junk food.

Every trainer’s dream, right? A party full of potential clients. I often think about setting up a booth right next to the dessert bar to hand out business cards and collect trainer retainer fees.

Anyway, the topic of fitness and nutrition always comes up, along with some crappy myths and pseudo science that people buy into. And there’s nothing l love more that helping people plow through what they should be doing compared to what they are doing.

It usually goes something like this:

Me: So, what kind of workouts are you doing now?

Them: Well, I do weights two times a week and take spinning three times a week. Sometimes I do yoga and run a lot, too. I haven’t been able to lose the last five pounds. I want a better butt and toned arms. And abs. I want abs.

Me: How long have you been doing this and who gave you the routine?

Them: I kinda made it up myself. I usually go to classes with my friends who are also trying to get in shape. It’s fun. We get the workouts from Pinterest. Then, sometimes we go to happy hour afterward. Do I have to give up drinking completely. Because it’s a stress reliever for me.

Me: Ugh! ( Of course, I’m just thinking this.)

But, what I actually say is this:

First, stop getting your workouts from Pinterest. And from magazines, too. As much as you think you want and need the information in there, you don’t. It’s like asking your boyfriend how many girls he’s slept with. It’s of no use to you.

There are only a few things you can do to change the way you look. The word “tone” doesn’t exist and there’s no real definition for it. You can only make a muscle bigger or smaller. The same for fat cells, too. You also cannot shape or elongate a muscle. Therefore, your only goal is to build muscle and lose fat.

A woman’s fear of getting big from lifting weights is completely unfounded. Females don’t have the hormonal profile of a man to build muscle – and it s extremely hard even for men to build muscle.

Also, the principles that make up an effective program for men should be exactly the same for woman. Muscle is muscle and fat is fat. There are a few small differences but for the most part women should:

1) Lift heavy – light dumbbells will not change your body.

2) Use big compound exercises – triceps kickbacks, leg extensions and inner/outer thigh exercises can and should be upgraded.

3) Improve your workouts weekly – doing the same thing over and over will not yield results

The process of losing body fat is really simple.

Don’t over complicate it with nonsense and time-wasting exercises or workouts.