Can he see your true colors?

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First Posted: 11/30/2014

When on the search for a new relationship, we often see that people will try molding themselves into the person that they believe their crush would want them to be. People fake hobbies and interests and turn up certain aspects of who they are to appear to be the perfect match. While this fake version of you may look like a diamond in the rough to the new guy, when he sees it was all just an act, you will find yourself looking like as fake as cubic zirconia. When it comes to love, the biggest truth you can give to another person is to never lie to yourself.

My story into the forays of love began in kindergarten at the ripe age of 5. His name was Lenny and we spent many hours of recess playing house, tag and red rover (until it was banned for too many broken wrists). He told me he loved the power rangers, a show that I had no interest in. Because he told me he liked it, I forced myself to watch it as a sign of my solidarity to his interests and commitment to this newly blossoming romance. In time, the love fizzled out. I never became a fan and found relief that I didn’t have to watch that show anymore. Little did I know that these actions would echo into my adult life.

Fast forward 25 years and I am finding myself still surrounded by single girls watching the proverbial Power Rangers. For example, I know a girl who is very “kept”. She is not the type of girl who will go walking in the woods out of fear of getting dirt under her nails; however, the guy she is crushing on is outdoorsy. She wants to be with him whatever the cost and has now invested in a Coleman lantern and some flannels hoping he will see they have things in common.

How will this benefit her in the long run? It should be more important to be with someone with similar interests rather than to fake who you are to try impress someone else. Eventually, if the guy asks you to go camping and wrestle a bear for dinner, he is going to see that the closest you have ever come to living off the land, is when you have gone shopping in the produce department at Wegman’s.

Ladies, the jig is up. While it is important that you try new things and find common ground with your mate, pretending to love sports you have no interest in, watching movies you can’t stand and taking on hobbies that you detest, is not the way to make yourself happy. Be honest about what you like and are interested in. Compromising the incredible person you are is never worth it. If you want to find satisfaction and longevity in your relationship, you will need to turn off the Power Ranger personality and turn on the real you inside.